I am the ugliest sight during training. My face so flushed I am but seconds from a crippling stroke. My heart thumping away at maximum and this uncontrollable chanting goes on in my head that I cant decide if I should be a lump of fat of a bag of bones.
To be honest, I really hate training like that, training where I feel I need to be better, fitter and more presentable. I stumble, I have this perpetual face of grimace hanging on the walls of my face. I heave I wheeze, I am but weak. I look at my legs I see bruises and scabs forming on those shiny smooth knees that went on a 7 month long holiday and pampering. I end up standing awkwardly in the middle of the street clutching onto my thigh to death, freezing in this indescribable pose because hell I had a cramp which soon spread to my calves and that one nerve connecting to my toe cant seem to relax itself.
The evil one makes a good case telling why I should even bother. My golden days are clearly over so why time and again I make myself go through this training hailing from hell. But I opened that special box I always kept somewhere in the recesses of my heart and out flowed those beautiful beautiful memories I had with ball and game . So I cant bear to let it go, not yet. I dont want to waste the little time I have left to play until my circumstances forbid me to.
So yeah, I am back. SMUVB,I still got your back.
Post note: It was vball sleepover yesterday after training. Last year was a disaster and I planned it so I thought to make it up this year by attending hahah. Clearly I am old and no longer cut out for sleepless night, boozing (seriously after my second cup I just kept pouring in guava juice into the cup), leaving my heart bare on table tops for all to admire. I feel old as I looking at the young ppl but I am happy. I was serious when I said I/we waited a long long time for them to appear and god forbid they leave. I hope this find it in them as did I when I stuck by this team these 4 years.
Havent much time left, counting down.